WWE – Why I Moan

I have a confession for you all, I feel bad every time I spend a few thousand words moaning about WWE. In the past few years, I’ve seen my wrestling taste change. Moving away from that company, I’ve discovered a world of new things to watch. Therefore, it often feels like I’m going out of my way to go back and bash something I hate. Rather than spending an afternoon watching New Japan or wXw, I’ve chosen to put my hours into WWE, well aware that it will probably piss me off. I don’t listen to pop music and then moan that it’s not for me, so why do it with wrestling?

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Roman Reigns – Where’s The Plan B?

As someone who doesn’t watch weekly, I completely forgot he was IC champ. Credit: WWE

WrestleMania may still be two and a half months away, but we are getting ready to hit that build-up hard. Which means it’s probably not ideal for WWE to have their star man being caught up in stories of an illegal nature. That’s never going to look good. And whether it turns out Roman has been taking steroids or not, it is awful timing. Because if the worst comes to past, what does WWE do if something happens to Roman?

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Kazuchika Okada: The Unbeatable Champion

Destined to fight forever? Credit: NJPW

“All of which leads us to January 4th and Okada vs Naito. The golden boy vs the rebel. There’s only one way this should go and it’s with the rebel getting the win.”

The words of, well, me. In the build-up to Wrestle Kingdom, I was so sure that Naito would beat Okada that I’d have bet your life on it. It seemed like a foregone conclusion. The pretty pink bow on Naito’s long story. Honestly, I still think it should have been, but the evils have popped out of Pandora’s box, and they ain’t going back in. So, we’re left with Okada and time to ponder whether this was the right story to tell.

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Kevin Owens vs. Shane McMahon

Owens is the heel WWE needs. Credit: WWE

This Sunday Shane McMahon will walk into a Hell in a Cell match with Kevin Owens. It will be the third time he’s wrestled since his shock return in the build-up to WrestleMania 32. Both of those previous matches took place at a WrestleMania and yet, it’s possible this is the most important one yet. The Undertaker and AJ Styles didn’t need the rub of a McMahon to establish themselves, while Kevin Owens (despite having been around for a while) feels like he does at the moment. He’s been floundering since he moved to SmackDown.

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Enzo Amore

I mean, look at the bellend. Credit: WWE

For the second week in a row, the final segment on Raw (minus a short SHIELD tease) focused on the Cruiserweight Division vs. Enzo Amore. It’s a feud that has generated a double turn as an entire division turned face due to their disgust at the twat in a hat holding the belt. The question is, will this actually work? Is Enzo Amore the thing to save 205 Live?

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Is WWE Racist?

Credit: WWE

Last Tuesday night WWE sent Jinder Mahal (a heel whose main motivation is the fact he’s Indian) down to the ring to make a series of crass jokes about Shinsuke Nakamura. He made fun of the Japanese tendency to pronounce ls as rs and referred to Shinsuke as Mr Miyagi. They were dumb, insensitive jokes and screamed of something that Vince McMahon would find hilarious. They also speak to a problem at the heart of WWE.

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No Mercy

Brock toss. Credit: WWE

No Mercy 2017 is shaping up to be one hell of a night. You’ve got the new vs the old as Roman Reigns clashes with John Cena and a war of monsters when Braun Strowman does battle with Brock Lesnar. Underneath that, you’ve got a fatal four-way for the Women’s Title with three of the bigger stars of the division and a tag match between two of WWE’s better sides. It’s a guaranteed night of good wrestling, so why does it feel like WWE still don’t know what they are doing?

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Asuka

The end? Or the beginning? Credit: WWE

WWE has released this news into the wild already, but, if you want absolutely no spoilers from the most recent NXT tapings, stop reading now. You stopped? Good. After over 500 days and an undefeated streak that must be around the 200 match mark, The Empress of Tomorrow, Asuka, has relinquished her NXT title. The news came at a time when she is believed to have suffered a collarbone injury, but WWE is treating it as being the set-up for her move to the main roster. Where, if they have any sense, she will do it all again.

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Heck

Heck are – and soon will have been – a special band. A band that made rock and roll exciting and dangerous. Seeing them live was like dancing along the edge of a cliff in the rain. There was always the chance they could slip, but while they balanced there, it was the most thrilling thing in the world.

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Fuck You Gene Simmons

Rather than using pictures of Gene ugly mug I’m going to fill this post with music from young bands that represent the rock scene that is apparently dying.

 

 

 

In what may be the least of his crimes but perhaps the one that sums him up the best, Gene Simmons has attempted to trademark the Devil’s Horns. Yes, you read that right, he wants control over the hand gesture thrown by a million heavy metal fans and adopted as a central part of our culture. Why? Because in his twisted little mind he believes he invented it. Even if you ignore the falsehood of that in light of the claims of Ronnie James Dio and pictures of Coven doing it in 1967 six years before KISS formed, this is still the act of a puckered old arsehole and should be the final nail in the idea that we should care about Gene Simmons.

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