NJPW World Tag League (23/11/19) Review

Suzuki-gun plays with their food. Credit: NJPW

From now on, unless something remarkable happens, these reviews are going to be speedy. A paragraph per a match feels about right because quite frankly I’m already putting too much time into them by watching the damn things.

Mad Muscle Men (Jeff Cobb and Mikey Nicholls) (3-3) defeated Tencozy (Satoshi Kojima and Hiroyoshi Tenzan) (3-3)

A fairly standard opener. I’ve been harsh on Nicholl’s New Japan run, but the guy is better as a tag team wrestler, and if they’re going to keep using him in the future, they should either make this team a regular thing or find him another full-time partner. He also got the three, pinning Koji with a Mikey Bomb for his biggest win since returning to Japan.

Verdict: Three Stars

Los Ingobernables de Japon (SANADA and EVIL) (4-0) defeated Yuji Nagata and Manabu Nakanishi (1-5)

I love SANADA and think he’s more than proven himself as a main eventer, but there is no denying he’d be a great comedy wrestler. His attempts to deal with the size and power of Nakanishi were proof of that. Throw in a bit of EVIL and Nagata stiffing it out, and this was enjoyable despite Nakanishi’s well-discussed weaknesses (those weaknesses being that he looks to be in pain when he walks).

Verdict: Three Stars

GBH (Togi Makabe and Tomoaki Honma) (3-2) defeated Toru Yano and Colt Cabana (3-2)

Hands up if you remembered that Yano and Makabe are two-thirds of the NEVER Six-Man champions? I certainly didn’t. If you enjoy Colt and Yano’s antics, then you’ll get some pleasure out of this while Honma breaking the Superman with a Kokeshi was good. Outside of that, it didn’t have much.

Verdict: Two And A Half Stars

The Bullet Club (KENTA and Yujiro Takahashi) (3-2) defeated Dangerous Tekkers (Zack Sabre Jr and Taichi) (2-4)

If you haven’t been watching KENTA’s post-match interviews, get on it. He’s been nailing it recently. As for this match, they spent most of it brawling on the floor, which was fucking boring. Things picked up when ZSJ and Taichi were actually in the ring with KENTA, so it would have been nice to see a bit more of that, but we can’t all have nice things, can we?

Verdict: Two And Three Quarter Stars

FinJuice (Juice Robinson and David Finlay) (5-1) defeated Double Rampage (Shingo Takagi and El Terrible) (2-4)

I realise brawling on the outside is quite fun for those in the building and is easier than putting together a match, but could we cut back on it? Perhaps just a little? Especially when another big part of the action is Terrible biting people. There were moments where this found some momentum, but they went under ten minutes and never got to a level above fine. While I would watch Shingo wrestle both of these men again, I would also watch him Pumping Bomber my cupboard, so that’s not saying much.

Verdict: Two And A Half Stars

CHAOS (Tomohiro Ishii and YOSHI-HASHI) (4-2) defeated HenarAce (Hiroshi Tanahashi and Toa Henare) (2-4)

Thank Christ for Tomohiro Ishii. This match was plodding along towards mediocrity when he entered the ring and slapped The Ace into Tanahashi. From there, we got a fun closing stretch that even had YOSHI bring it in a great back and forth with Henare. This was my match of the night so far, and I can’t see the main event topping it

Verdict: Three And A Half Stars

Guerrillas of Destiny (Tama Tonga and Tonga Loa) (3-1) defeated Suzuki-gun (Minoru Suzuki and Lance Archer) (2-3)

I was right. After my earlier complaint, a large part of this match took place on the outside. I get that it’s Suzuki’s shtick, and he probably needs to do it at his age, but if that’s the case why have the two earlier matches do the same? Loa and Archer having a hoss off was quite fun, but giving Tama the pin over MiSu should be a crime. There was a low blow, but New Japan not protecting him like they used to only adds fuel to the rumour that he might be on his way out.

Verdict: Two And A Half Stars

Overall Show

Watch the semi-main event and leave it there. Actually, Suzuki had a temper tantrum after the main, so perhaps check that out too, they’re always fun. Tag League has settled into the mediocre with very little being shite but even less being good.

Watch New Japan: https://njpwworld.com/

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