Tokyo Joshi returned to Sumo Hall for one of the most important shows of the year (it’s certainly the one I care about the most). Fittingly, they’ve gone all out. We’ve got giant pandas, Kyoraku Kyomei trying to take down kaiju, and Miu Watanabe getting her shot at the Ace! That’s just the beginning, too. It is a card that only gets better the longer you look at it, so let’s see what went down.
In an inspired move, they’re giving Neko a mecha. TJPW are teaming up with Armored Trooper Votoms (an anime I know nothing about) to create mechas inspired by Miyu Yamashita and Haruna Neko. I dare you bastards to try and bully the wee cat now! We also got our new Up Up Girls’ song, a jaunty wee bop with a catchy refrain that had everyone going for it. However, I worry they’re getting a bit over-enthusiastic with these new songs. Will they only have to play ‘Upper Kick’ once now at their shows? It’s the end of an era.
Haru Kazashiro, Runa Okubo & Uta Takami defeated Shino Suzuki, Kira Summer & Chika Nanase
Our opener had already justified its existence with the entrances, as seeing all the rookies’ delight at being showered in streamers was lovely. Watching someone get caught off guard by how many streamers they’ve received is one of wrestling’s great pleasures.
The match itself was a chance to establish the hierarchy between our newbies. Wee Uta was the one to take the most punishment, as Kira and Chika were able to outmuscle her from the start. We even saw Shino get mean, taking advantage of Takami’s youthful bendiness to stretch her back in an uncomfortable-looking submission. The youngest Up Up Girl has previously come across as feisty rather than sympathetic, but she’s so tiny that having her in that role was always going to work, and with how expressive she is (she already loves a yelp of pain), Uta was born to be picked on. Perhaps even more enjoyable was seeing Runa and Haru play the part of the cavalry, tagging in and using their whole year of experience to turn the tide back in their favour. It feels like only yesterday they were nervously making their debut.
And look, this wasn’t perfect. Chika and Kira are both still a touch unsure in the ring, and they kept things basic. However, it was a bunch of kids (both literally and in a wrestling sense) without adult supervision getting the chance to perform at one of the most famous venues in the world. It would be wild if they weren’t nervous. That they went out, didn’t fuck anything up and put together a solid opener is to their credit. Plus, we got the cherry on top of Haru debuting a new Fisherman’s Suplex for the win. TJPW’s future is looking bright, and when you see how far Haru, Runa and Shino have come in a year, you can’t help but feel excited to see where Chika and Kira will be twelve months from now.
Verdict: Well Done, Rookies!
Nao Kakuta & Ami Yumoto defeated Mahiro Kiryu & HIMAWARI
Ami Yumoto is the latest idol to step into TJPW, although she does have some experience, having previously appeared in Tofu Pro-Wrestling. Tokyo Joshi must have plans for her, as they surrounded her with a group of safe hands, ready to guide her through her first steps into this world.
They were steps that Yumoto took confidently. I think we often underestimate how valuable having experience working in front of crowds is when it comes to this stuff. Yes, Ami looked a bit nervous as she entered, but the second the bell rang, the switch flicked, and she relaxed into it. People like Kira and Chika are, naturally, going to have to get used to getting in that ring in front of all those lights and people, but for these idols, it’s just another day on the job. That same confidence allowed her to move around like a human being and avoid the trap of going dead behind the eyes as she tried to remember what to do next. When you’re just trying to get through that first outing without fucking up, the ability to relax and keep your cool makes all the difference.
If you were being harsh, you could point to this match being designed for her to succeed, protecting her from doing anything too complicated as everyone else fed into her more flashy gymnastics. You wouldn’t be wrong to say any of that, but I think it’s somewhat pointless feedback. Who knows how committed Yumoto is to wrestling, but right now, she’s figuring this shit out, and if TJPW wanted to make her look good, well, they succeeded. She had an impressive debut, taking Mahiro out with a big (somewhat clumsy) dive to the floor and leaving Nao free to get the win over HIMAWARI. There are improvements to be made, but if this is the starting base, she’s got a lot of potential.
Verdict: A Strong Start
Raku & Pom Harajuku defeated Andreza the Giant Panda & Kaya Toribami w/Haruna Neko
Nonsense. Beautiful, wonderful nonsense.
Matches like this are always more about moments than the whole. There is only so much you can do when the in-between bits require you to work around a giant panda who takes a good minute or so to get in and out of the ring. Thankfully, the moments were great. From Raku sulking because her attempt to jump Andreza hadn’t worked, through a head-stomping Goodnight Express to a finish that saw Raku whack said panda with a pillow. Three months from now, I won’t remember everyone jumping up on the apron to wrench the ropes apart so Andreza could get in and out, but I will remember those little sprinkles of magic, each one delighting me in its own way.
I also think Raku and Pom deserve credit for how well they dealt with this. From selling their fear when they first laid eyes on him to their combined attempts to take Andreza off his feet, they committed to the bit, and that’s so important in these matches. ‘Irony wrestling’ has become a well-used phrase among boring critics, but if you want to get something good out of Andreza, you can’t approach it with a wry smile. You need to treat it seriously. Or at least as seriously as Pom and Raku treat anything. Point out the seams in the act, and this whole thing falls apart, but treat him like a giant, deadly headbutting panda, and you can find the charm.
Anyway, if it’s not already obvious, I had a lovely time with this. Raku and Pom were great, Kaya played her role nicely, and we got to see the wee cat (who, sadly, still has a brace on her knee, so she probably isn’t back soon). A lovely time was had by all.
Verdict: Lovely Nonsense
SKE48 turned up next, treating everyone to a mini-concert. To repeat the point I make whenever they perform on a TJPW show, it’s not my kind of thing, but they are impressive. They’ve got a slick operation going on there, and the fact that Arai was out blasting through some song and dance routines while still having to wrestle a match later on in the show exhausts me, so fuck knows how she felt.
Shinken Kusho (Moka Miyamoto & Juria Nagano) defeated Wakana Uehara & Toga
Half the roster debuts new gear on these shows, so I don’t tend to mention it, but Toga’s was a big upgrade on what she had before. She looks cool.
Not that the focus was on Toga. With her retirement looming, they built this match around Juria, and, perhaps unsurprisingly, it highlighted both the pros and cons of her short wrestling career. When she is on the offensive, dishing out those kicks, Nagano is thrilling. It’s been the case since day one, but it’s always worth mentioning because the idea that she could kick someone’s head into the back row is key to what makes her work. Less impressive is the stuff that links it all together. I talked about how you excuse a touch of awkwardness in an Andreza match, but it’s a bit harder when the person you’re talking about isn’t a giant panda, and it still looks like Juria needs to take a second between each move to decide what to do next. It gives so much of her work a stilted, slightly nervy feel, and with her limited schedule, it was something she could never shake off. She’s ended up being decent, but that prevented her from ever being more than that.
Outside of Juria, this was solid but uneventful. It would have been second on the card if not for the looming retirement, and while everyone worked hard, it never quite sparked into life. I also felt sorry for Toga, who debuted her Rolling Thunder but made a hash of it the first time, forcing her to do it again. It wasn’t the end of the world, but I’m sure it was something she’d worked on, so for it to go wrong when it mattered most must have stung. Still, this was perfectly acceptable undercard fare that I will remember nothing about in a month.
Verdict: Fine
Masha Slamovich defeated Rika Tatsumi
Maybe it’s with the benefit of hindsight, but I think Masha Slamovich feels like even less of a natural fit for TJPW than Max the Impaler did. Max, for all their darkness, was a big character entering a land of other big characters. Masha feels different. She’s edgier and more physical, bringing a style that feels more at home in a Marvelous or SEAd than in the bright, idol world of TJPW. Yet, so far, it’s working.
Much like with Miyu Yamashita at Ittenyon, it felt like Masha pulled another side out of Rika. Tatsumi is used to being the bully, tormenting and controlling opponents, but she couldn’t get away with that here. If Rika was to go for the throat from the start, you got the impression Masha would have been happy to headbutt her in the mouth. So, in a way that has only ever really happened against Miyu, Tatsumi was forced to wrestle from beneath, struggling against the hard-hitting power of her opponent. Slamovich controlled the bulk of this match, leaving Rika to try and force her way into an opening, be that through a Dragon Screw to set up the Figure Four or a hip attack against the ropes.
And Tatsumi did well, throwing herself into the fray with that wild abandon we all know she has, but it always felt like Slamovich had a bit more up her sleeve. Rika is no angel, but Masha was bigger and stronger than her, capable of hammering away with strikes that the White Dragon slowly realised she had no answer to. Towards the end, she fired up, throwing everything she had at it, but it was all starting to feel a bit inevitable. When Masha spiked Rika on her head with a piledriver, there was no chance of her kicking on.
It made for the kind of match I have always liked, as Rika was introduced to a bigger and scarier force that, right now, she didn’t have an answer for. She’s tough, but Masha is tougher, and if she wants to get on that level, she has to find a way to match her physicality. Miyu’s done it. Can Rika? I wouldn’t bet against her.
Verdict: Rika Meets The Bigger Fish
Aja Kong & Max the Impaler defeated Kyoraku Kyomei (Shoko Nakajima & Hyper Misao)
It’s time to go kaiju hunting. Wait, that’s not a kaiju. It’s Aja Kong. Oh, shit.
Fair play to Shoko and Misao – they understood the assignment here. Up against two terrifying monsters, they bumped their arses off, flying through chairs and being rag-dolled around the ring. Shoko, in particular, went out of her way to make Aja and Max look strong, and it’s not exactly like they need it. They’re pretty damn good at doing that themselves. However, if you’re going to throw someone about, it might as well be Nakajima, who committed to every one of those bumps. Then again, she did also stop Kong from getting onto the HyperMobile, which is about as big a heel move as you can get in my eyes. I want to see Aja Kong ride a bike!
All that bumping around meant that when Shoko and Misao got their chances, it felt more than earned. Of course, we were building up to the spot with said bike, Misao riding it into Aja on the ramp, but that wasn’t the highlight. That came with the follow-up, Misao leaping from the top with the I am a Hero crossbody, connecting with Kong and coming within milliseconds of getting the win. It was only a diving Max that prevented one of the bigger upsets of recent times, and it speaks to the talent of all involved that I was fully convinced it was coming. There aren’t many people who can trick me into believing they’re about to beat Aja Kong, but Hyper Misao is one of them.
Most of all, I think this match succeeded at presenting big show undercard wrestling. We got laughs, exciting moments and the satisfaction of watching Max get the opportunity to wrestle alongside one of their heroes. That tiny moment with Misao aside, the result was never really in doubt, but they put together a journey to that ending that did more than enough to make up for any lack of uncertainty. Once again, Kyoraku Kyomei proved themselves one of the most valuable pairings on the card, and at this point, that shouldn’t even begin to be a surprise.
Verdict: Big Show Wrestling!
Minoru Suzuki defeated Maki Itoh
I’ve made no secret of having not particularly enjoyed Maki Itoh’s big show appearances in recent times. Since she started making regular trips to America, she’s fallen under the influence of a few bad eggs and started indulging the worst of her instincts a touch too often. However, when this match was announced, I was hopeful. Itoh biting off more than she can chew and picking a fight against a grizzled bastard she had no hope of beating felt like a throwback to when her primary role was to get destroyed and burst into tears. If anyone could drag Itoh back to what she does best, it was Suzuki.
And I’m delighted to announce that’s what happened. Paired up against a brick wall, Itoh couldn’t help but throw herself at it, smashing her head against it until she found a way through. The fact that she’s never going to do so doesn’t seem to occur to her, as she thrives on the idea that if she finds that little bit more fire, somehow, it will all come together. Christ, there were moments in this match where she tried to grapple with Suzuki, something that people who do stand a chance at beating him would think twice about, but she’s so pigheaded that it never occurs to her not to give it a go.
It also has to be said that the motivated version of MiSu turned up here. We’ve all seen him sleepwalk through forearm-heavy matches with mediocre wrestlers across America and the UK, but you could tell he was having a blast pissing about with Itoh. Between the beatings, there was time to play for a couple of laughs, be it Maki and Referee Matsui bursting into tears when he got a bit rough or his refusal to lie still for the Kokeshi. He also probably sold more for Itoh than he did 95% of those aforementioned people, taking the time to put over the cutest punches, which even I think might have been a touch too generous.
Still, it was enough for Itoh to earn MiSu’s respect, as he encouraged the fans to cheer her on in the aftermath before offering his hand. However, in one final moment of genius, Itoh responded by raising her middle finger in time with ‘Kaze Ni Nare’, a spark of resistance that saw Suzuki respond by dragging her away via that finger. It was nice to have you back, Itoh. Please let this version of you stick around.
Verdict: That’s My Itoh
Magical Suggar Rabbits (Yuka Sakazaki & Mizuki) defeated TeaDK (Chris Brookes & Emi Sakura)
I didn’t consider it at the time, but after leaving TJPW, the best place for Yuka Sakazaki to have her next match was TJPW. It was an inspired move, really. No one saw it coming.
Jokes aside, I have no idea what’s going on with Yuka, but AEW’s loss is our gain because having her back, even if just for this show, was fantastic. A big TJPW outing without her would be missing a bit of magic, and while I know it will happen eventually, I am more than happy to delay that moment. Plus, it gave her the chance to face off with the newly dubbed TeaDK, a name that seemed to come more from Emi Sakura than Chris Brookes.
That dynamic influenced how they approached this match, as our outsiders stooged their way through proceedings. When they weren’t bickering with each other, they were being total bastards, relishing the chance to beat up on two wrestlers significantly smaller than them (I know Brookes is tall and MagiRabbi aren’t, but the difference is still remarkable). They were the perfect opponents for this comeback, as they were powerful enough to provide a genuine threat to TJPW’s superpowered pairing (the run of moves that ended with a Brookes Somato was outstanding) but also dysfunctional enough that the MagiRabbi victory didn’t feel totally improbable.
It also granted us a couple of fantastic showdowns, as Chris Brookes got up close with the muscles he has so often admired on commentary when Yuka somehow managed to hoist him into the air. Even more impressive, though, was Emi and Mizuki. It’s easy to forget that Mizuki is quietly a Sakura-lass, but when you see them in the ring together, it’s so obvious. All the way through, it felt like Mizuki was a step ahead of one of the people who shaped her, even slipping out of the way of moves that connected with Yuka. It made that final flurry between them thrilling, as it felt the whole way through like either could get the win, right up to the point where Mizuki bundled Emi up for the three. Four of the best around produce a hell of a match? Who could have seen that coming? Now, how do we convince Yuka to hang around just a little longer?
Verdict: A Blast
Yuki Arai defeated Yuki Kamifuku to retain the International Princess Title
Dressed in her new Saki Akai-inspired gear, Yuki Kamifuku was determined to throw Yuki Arai off her game in this one. Whether it was slipping out of the ring, throwing a few poses or yanking Arai’s throat into the ropes, everything Kamiyu did seemed designed to try and rankle the idol, perhaps hoping she’d lose her cool or stumble at a key moment. It was a smart strategy, and as one of the better bullies on the TJPW roster, Kamiyu was the perfect person to execute it.
The problem is that Arai continually proves herself tougher than people give her credit for. Kamiyu kept niggling at her, trying everything to prod her buttons, but Arai stood tall, refusing to fall for it. It got to the point where there was only one way to solve this: a big boot-off. The two of them fell back on the simple shit, repeatedly booting each other in the head until one of them couldn’t get up. The match had flipped from Kamiyu trying to get in Arai’s head to trying to cave it in.
It all served as a reminder of why Kamiyu’s run with this title put it on the map. She has a talent for these short, tight and well-executed matches that play into the strengths of those involved. She did it back when she wrestled the likes of Mirai as champion, and now, with Yuki Arai holding the belt, she did it again, playing into both of their hands to deliver something that just worked. It wasn’t spectacular, and of the three title matches on this show, it was definitely the least emotional, but it did what it needed to do, and sometimes that’s enough.
Verdict: Kamiyu Still Has That Golden Touch
Daisy Monkey (Suzume & Arisu Endo) defeated Yukiniki (Ryo Mizunami & Yuki Aino) to win the Princess Tag Titles
I’m a real sucker for the opening seconds of a match setting the scene for what’s to come. The bell rang, and Arisu flew across the ring to hit a dropkick on Yuki Aino. That’s hardly anything special, as roughly half a million joshi outings have started that way. The twist? This time, it wasn’t Aino taken off her feet. No, she stood her ground and barged through the attack, sending Arisu spinning off in the other direction and instantly establishing the theme they laid out in the build-up tags. Arisu and Suzume were overpowered, and they would have to come up with something quick if they wanted to get out of this with the win.
The match that followed reminded me of Magenta’s title victory against ChikaTak. Much like that, there was a sense here that Suzume and Endo were battling uphill but with a plan. With a couple of hosses (one of whom has more years under her belt than Daisy Monkey combined) across the ring from them, they were always going to struggle to control this match. Even when they did get a flurry of offence, they struggled to take advantage of it, as we saw Mizunami simply refuse to let Endo lock on the Camel Clutch, powering her way to the ropes before it could get fully cinched in.
Yet, they never gave up. Even as it looked like the action was slipping through their fingers, Daisy Monkey nibbled at the edges, opening the cracks they could burst through to victory. Aino and Aniki had power, but they had speed, and slowly but surely, that began to play in their favour. One of the great things about Daisy Monkey is that you can always hear them yelling each other on, pushing each other to keep going, and that worked even better here than usual, as there was a sense they were getting closer and closer to crafting the chance they needed, and all they had to do was be ready to take it.
And they did it. That one opportunity opened up, and they greedily grabbed it, Suzume hitting the Ring-A-Bell on Aino and getting out of there with the three. When she was handed the title afterwards, she hugged it to her chest, clinging to it like it was the most important thing in the world. Christ, I imagine at that moment, to her, it was. Daisy Monkey took a beating in this match – they looked like they didn’t stand a chance – but they held their ground and came away champions. That’s good wrestling, folks.
Verdict: DAISY MONKEY!!!
Miu Watanabe defeated Miyu Yamashita to win the Princess of Princess Titles
Do you want to know why you spend years building an unbeatable champion who ploughs through everyone’s favourites time after time? It’s for moments like this. It’s for when you realise you’ve found that gem who is ready to break through, and it means that when they beat that champion, it means the world. Miyu Yamashita defines TJPW – she has since almost day one – and Miu Watanabe walked in and pinned her clean in the centre of the ring. No one can argue against the size of that achievement.
And there was a sense here that Miu had the ace rattled from the start. In the build, I praised the badassery of Yamashita pinning Nao Kakuta and stalking across the ring to stand over Miu with her arms outstretched. However, when she did the same after hitting an Attitude Adjustment on the apron early in the match, I realised this wasn’t normal Miyu behaviour. I’m not saying she’s beyond a bit of celebration here and there, but in big title matches, Yamashita is a cold, hardened killer. When faced with this upstart, though, the first member of the new generation who genuinely feels like she can step up to Miyu’s level, she felt the need to assert herself. It’s one thing to lose to Yuka, Shoko, Rika or Mizuki, but it’s another to lose to someone who isn’t her peer.
Yet, it wasn’t the need to put Watanabe in her place that decided this match. That was all down to the challenger. Time after time, it looked like Miu had hit the wall. Whether it was that early blow on the apron, Yamashita popping up after a Teardrop, or when that skull kick cracked into the side of her head, every single one of them felt like the beginning of the end. It’s another advantage of those years of Ace dominance, as the definitive full stop of one of those kicks followed by the three is as familiar a sight as anything to a TJPW fan. But Miu wouldn’t let it happen. Every time she was down and out, she came roaring back, her confidence in the fact that she is strong pushing her on. Yamashita could kick her around the ring all she wanted, but Watanabe always knew that when push came to shove, she could power through, relying on her muscles to get her where she needed to be.
And it brought her to the title. It was the end result of a journey that starts with a young lass’s dreams of being an idol and seeing wrestling as a means to an end. Yet, slowly but surely, this beautiful nonsense got its hook into her, drawing her in and making her care. Don’t get me wrong, the enthusiasm with which she opened the show with the Up Up Girls proves those idol dreams will never go away, but wrestling has found an equal spot in her heart, and when she dropped Miyu with that Teardrop, getting the kind of definitive three that has been TJPW’s Ace’s stock in trade, it felt right. She’s our champ, and I’m damn proud of her.
Verdict: MIU!!!!!!
Overall Show
Never bet against big show TJPW. Fair warning – this is a long one (as if you could have read the several thousand words I’ve written about it and not figured that out), the kind that eats up a day. However, it’s worth it. From enthusiastic rookies revelling in streamers through Aja Kong being hit by a bike and ending on Miu holding that title aloft, this was the good shit. Watch it!
Watch Tokyo Joshi Pro: https://www.wrestle-universe.com/en/videos?labels=-tjpw.
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